Conditional If and Wishful Thinking

How many times in our life we wish things are different? We start to throw away “If.. If..If..” one after another but..Hang in There, Did you know that there are 3 different cases to complete that sentence correctly? there are three cases that we need to think of.

  1. Possible case in the present  >> If + present tense + Will + infinitive/present tense/imperative
  2. Imposible/improbable case in the present >> If + past tense + would + infinitive
  3. Imposible case in the past >> if + Past Perfect Tense + Would Have + Past Participle

When i learned about it about more than decade ago (*cry* it has been so long).  I found it confusing therefore i kept using type 1 for all case which was then jeopardize my english grammar. LOL.

Everything was blurry until i experienced things in life and starting to use or hear those sentences. Remember how you wish things have gone differently? you wish you have done things differently. The strongest impression for me was regarding death. “Had i known it sooner, i would have gone back earlier”. Can you feel the despair? even thinking about it sinks my heart now.  Since the very first time i heard it, i’ve made a mental notes that your loved one should come first in any circumstances. You could leave all those things and do it later but life and time won’t wait.

Over the time, i encounter lots of other experiences too where i could only give some suggestion by trying to put myself on other people’s shoes. This is where i meet “If i were you, i would…”. in fact,  i can’t be you. it’s impossible. I could only try to think as if i am in your position. This sentece hit me sometime ago and in general this if condition is something that i classified as regretful too. Imagine parents wish for their sick kid –  “if only i could, i would bear the pain for you”. 

Oh dear, thinking about cases and how to use the conditional if made me feel dejected. i will close it here with.. “If you were here, it would be more cheerful”

Notes : i don’t hold any degree in language and open to any correction.. well, i know i messed up a lot. :/


Being (Partly) Multilingual For Me…

I’ve grown up in a multilingual environment. When i was able to remember and had an awareness of my surrounding, i have been able to talk mainly in Bahasa Indonesia, partly in Javanese, and very little of English.  At later stage of my life, i picked up other  languages which then help me with my travelling though i am not very good with them.

There are some events regarding ‘foreign’ languages that still very clear for me. For example, I was around 4 years old when i panicked over the phone not knowing how to answer in English properly. I was around 8 years old when people talk in Javanese about how i am not able to communicate in Javanese in front of me. I still remember how uneasy i was since i played dumb at that time. Give me a break, will you? i was still a kid anyway. 😛


However, it doesn’t stop there. The usual case for me now was when i called online taxi. It has happened many times till i give up somehow. The usual conversation would be :

Me (M) : Where are you?

Driver (D) :I am at the pick up point

M: I am at the pick up point. Where are you?

…couple of times later after repetitive and a never ending loop of where are you questions.. we Finally find each other…

D : … ( awkward silence then starting to giggle / laugh )

M : ( thinking to myself what’s wrong)

D: Sorry, but i thought you are a foreigner. I have passed by the place but i was looking for a Causcasian or an American. 

M : Well, i am not local.

D : …. ( another awkward silence ) You are not Malay? 

M : No, i am not. 

And then the conversation will continue on how curious they are on me and my accent. Somehow, they need to be reassured that i spent most of my years in Indonesia and not abroad. 😐

There are couple of others stories but let me stop here for now as actually i just want to write this thing without any proper outline yet. LOL.

Wish you were there so that we could be awkward together!